Dealing with Guilt & Shame

All emotions within the human being serve a purpose and are all related to fight or flight through our social evolution.

For example, social paranoia, looking over our shoulder or thinking someone is talking about us, thinking badly about us or even them knowing something we would rather they did not know.

This has its origins in fight or flight along with all the other emotions that have evolved over hundreds of thousands of years.

All these emotions from anger, anxiety and fear have their purpose and have an origin which lies within our evolution BUT guilt does not.

Guilt has got to be the most useless and pointless emotion and causes nothing but problems, serves no real purpose other than making people distressed and edgy.

Experiencing excessive guilt over a long-term period will play havoc with a person’s mind which can lead to either a therapist bill or medication and its inevitable dependency.

Stress-related hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline increase and can put the body into a state of fight or flight even when in a safe and relaxed place where there is no real threat.

Hormones releasing chemicals into the bloodstream over a long period of time can lead to insomnia, irritability, difficulty getting on with anyone along with an increase in blood pressure.

Guilt will certainly cause mayhem on your mental health and general physical well-being which can trigger off a need for other emotions and thoughts such as depression, negative thinking, fear anxiety and paranoia.

Paranoia usually follows long-term feelings of guilt which can be the result of misinterpretation, misunderstandings, faulty beliefs or just downright fear of being found out for a deed or act either intentional or unintentional you cause or did.

Many people who have been driving their car who were involved in an accident such as causing the death of a child or an elderly person whilst they were reaching for a mobile phone or a sweet.

The pedestrian’s death or their paralysis that left them in a wheelchair can leave the driver with immense feelings of guilt and remorse which just won’t go away and leads to self blame and other desperate feelings and in some extreme cases despair and suicide.

Medication may be prescribed for the accompanying symptoms of guilt because guilt never stands alone especially when it’s excessive and long-term. Guilt is always accompanied by other emotions and feelings!

Speaking with a therapist would be a good starting point as opposed to medication especially when there is a risk of reliance on dependency on tablets.

Medication may be helpful to start with as it can block or suppress feelings and the accompanying or surrounding thoughts but long-term medication will make things worse because the subconscious needs to do its thing and medication tries to block this.

Does acceptance work?

In life, acceptance of anything and everything is the cure to all.

However this is easier said than done as many people suffering from long-term guilt absolutely can’t except what they have done or what has happened in their life to cause the guilt.

Sometimes actions are performed intentionally or unintentionally directly or indirectly which can have a life changing effect leading to overwhelming feelings of guilt that may be known or not known by others.

Once an action or deed is carried out or has occurred then the genie is out of the bottle and it can never be put back.

Some people even turn to religion or spiritual practices such as yoga, meditation and deep relaxation to help.

Acceptance is the cure to all for some people suffering from extreme guilt and may need external help with managing this.

If you can work on excepting what has happened, what has occurred or what you have done and if you can open the door to starting to accept things then this can then lead to starting to forgive yourself simply because you can’t change what has happened, you can’t turn back time and undo it.

For those suffering from guilt long-term, there is no single word or sentence on this screen that hasn’t already been thought through with logic and reason why the guilty sufferer.

Apologies

If an apology is required such as calling at the family home of the person who for example you may have collided with in a car and caused their death and calling at that person’s family home to share the pain in both your suffering will more than likely help along with them as they will see the effect it’s having on you.

It’s just one of many examples where an apology might be required or could be applied and this may help to heal the pain and start to repair the damage that has been caused to all concerned.

Shame

Shame is so closely related to guilt along with the demon of paranoia, so rather than digging yourself deeper into a hole of depression and worthlessness, stand tall and confront the situation or call upon people and stand face-to-face with them and try to start a conversation or a dialogue where you can both communicate feelings and emotions if the situation warrants that.

Forgiveness

Again, forgiveness is easier said than done and that can only be done as a form of self healing and self repair so if you can forgive yourself for making a mistake or a massive life changing mistake which has destroyed you from inside out, along with possibly the hurt and pain or even death of someone else you may have caused.

In most cases if we are sincere then we can forgive ourselves if we are sincere enough with remorse and genuine feelings then we can find that a good starting place to start to heal ourselves.

Do good deeds for others

If you did an evil act or caused an irreversible event and you are remorseful and regretful of that now, then giving of yourself selflessly, without credit or recognition, praise or thanks or even anonymously can really help you heal because now you are demonstrating to yourself on several levels that you are paying back without any benefit or gratification to your ego. Giving back and paying back can help you heal.

Get professional help

There are many therapists around offering all sorts of treatments for guilt and shame. If your levels of guilt are so severe then book a consultation with one as a matter of urgency and get this sorted and start the healing process.

Do not make any changes to your medication without the advice of your GP or physician first. This article is for information purposes only.

Disclaimer

This article is for educational and informational purposes only and must not be used or taken as a substitute in any form for any medical, psychological (mental) advice, medication you are currently taking or any alternative treatments without the prior advice, guidance and consent from your medical doctor. Please speak with your doctor first before making any changes to your diet or medicine as a result of reading any information laid out on this website or in this or any other articles.

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